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Anal Sex Guide for Women

While formerly-kinky-as-heck items and events such as vibrators and erotica readings are now de rigueur, people just can't seem to get past the fact that plain old anal sex can be a normal and enjoyable aspect of partner sex. Why? As mentioned in our anal sex guide for men, some worry that it's messy. Others assume it's painful. And still others worry that partaking will make others think that they're a bit of a floozy (you let him stick his what where?). You guys. Listen to me.

We don't blame you for being curious about anal sex. After all, the anus and rectum contain almost as many nerve endings as your other erogenous zones. (You do like it when he stimulates your erogenous zones, right?) Do you really want to discount a huge source of pleasure just because you're worried about some crappy (awful pun intended) stigma?

Make a date with yourself to explore your booty. Prepare by going to the bathroom, and maybe even hopping in the shower. If you're worried about germs, this should pretty much guarantee that you're not surprised by mid-exploration poop. Once you've got that covered, all you have to do is lube up your index finger with something anal-friendly and start exploring!

Feel around outside of your back door first. Once you stop tensing up (it'll probably be an automatic reaction when you're just starting out), insert a single finger. Push out with your buttocks as you do so. It will make it easier to ease your way in. Concentrate on relaxing as you move your finger around inside of you, and experiment with massaging your inner walls with your finger crooked in different directions. Once you feel up to multitasking, play around back there with one hand while you simultaneously caress your nipples or play with your clitoris using the other hand. Once you become comfortable with this sort of touch, you can consider inserting something a bit larger…like a small butt plug.

Enjoying yourself? Ask your partner if he or she would like to play! Be sure to engage in a ton of foreplay. Being both relaxed and aroused (not to mention lubed up) is key. Then: Go slowly. Ask your partner to massage both your buttocks and the area around your anus before delving deeper. When you're ready, he can insert his finger (ahem, slowly) and shake it all about. If, after this, you feel you're ready for intercourse, there are several positions you can attempt. As the receiver, you can sit on your partner's lap, facing away from him or her. This way, they can control the depth of their penetration (whether by penis or strap-on dildo). Another option is spooning, which can be an ideal angle for laid-back, backdoor penetration. And doggie style-whether on all fours or with the head placed on the bed and the buttocks up in the air-can be great for G-spot stimulation.

Most important of all is communication. Talk about what feels good and what feels uncomfortable. Once you've made it past this point (and have experienced several, earth-shattering orgasms…or at least some moan-worthy sensations), you can try out a whole slew of other toys: larger butt plugs, anal beads, etc. Fun, right?

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