Party Planning: Where do I begin?

GET THE PARTY STARTED!

Set a date and send out Bachelorette Invitations. Try to do this at least 2-3 weeks in advance. Decide on the location. Do you want to throw it in home or at a nightclub? Both places require very different planning, and you'll need a good head count so that you can plan a budget.

Also, don't try to take the entire party on yourself! It will be more successful if you delegate and ask your guests to chip in.

DON'T FORGET THE PROPS...

If you've ever been to a Bachelorette Party, then you understand that the theme is to decorate the party and the bride with enough penis paraphernalia to resemble a bizarre, pagan fertility ritual. This could be the result of some left over prehistoric genetic behavior designed to insure reproduction. It could be our cultural obsession with the cock. Or, it could just be that most penises are just so damn funny looking that they make the perfect ice breakers. We certainly think so! So start shopping now for those important schlong supplies in our Bacheolorette Party Shopping section.

HIT THE ROAD!

Nothing adds more fun and debauchery to a Bachelorette Party than an exotic location. It's like a mini-vacation and conveniently far from the curious eyes and ears of grooms, family and co-workers! If you live within driving distance of a coastline, try getting a group discount for a weekend cruise. What better setting for an out of control all girl party?

Most cruises are one flat price, but they take care of the food, booze and entertainment. This will generally save everyone money and spare you the worries of cab fare and potential drunk drivers. You can also find good package offers to non stop party destinations like Las Vegas, Cancun and New Orleans. All you need is a basic hotel suite, and you've usually got room for the whole party. It's not hard to pack a group of wild women into one room when nobody's sleeping anyway!

TRANSPORTATION

This may not seem like an important issue until you have to move the party to a different location or find a roomful of drunken females a safe ride home. One fun solution? Pool your money and rent a limo or a party bus.

"I WANT TO THROW A WILD PARTY, BUT WHAT IF PEOPLE ARE OFFENDED?"

Wine Tastings are classy events, Bachelorette Parties are not. By their nature they are loud, funny, occasionally obnoxious and most definitely fun. Stay true to this theme and give the bride-to-be a night that she will never forget. Don't let a few party poopers ruin all your hard work! You can avoid potential mishaps by letting all your guests know in advance (like in your party invitations) that wild behavior will not only be tolerated, but rewarded as well! Advise close family members and guests with delicate sensibilities that they might feel more comfortable if they only attend the bridal shower.

THE BRIDESMAID'S REVENGE...

It's understood that the Bride will have to suffer a little good natured ribbing at her Bachelorette Party. However, when you see a group of bridesmaids happily snapping pictures of a nude, unconscious woman passed out in a shopping cart, you know she's receiving serious bridal karmic payback. Why does this happen? Because many brides suffer from a condition called BBB Syndrome, which is otherwise known as Bride Behaving Badly. Symptoms of BBB are pre-wedding hysteria, manic self obsession and fixation on ugly bridesmaid's dresses.

We believe Bachelorette Parties should be fun. We don't recommend that you use them as an opportunity to destroy whatever last shred of dignity your friend may have once had. That is, unless she forced you to wear a fuchsia bridesmaid's dress with lamb-chop sleeves and the dreaded "butt-bow." In that case, a compromising position with an inflatable love doll may be warranted before you pull out those cameras.

THE STAR OF THE SHOW

Don't forget who your party is for. It's her last night out as a free woman, so make sure that you show the lady a good time! The idea is to give her an excuse to do things she wouldn't normally do and go places she wouldn't normally go, and never will again. As the Hostess you are given a unique responsibility: You are the little devil on her shoulder, but you also have to get her home in one piece. Good luck!